If you're reading this to get a feel for the place then you must be a foreign tourist. If you're French we advise you stop right now. Not because we're about to slate the cuisine of your fine and glorious country, but because this Franglais excuse for a French café would make your grandmother turn in her grave. If indeed the old dear is actually in one. Umm anyway, Café Rouge –seen one, seen 'em all. Not bad for coffee, hot chocolate or a bowl of frites but if you're expecting authentic culinary expertise you took a wrong turn at Calais.